LONGER THAN A SHORT STORY: SHE THINKS SHE STANDS
“Did you see what she put on the group page?” She knocked excitedly on his door.
The lock turned twice slowly.
“Bee, why are you so excited this early morning” He rubbed his eyes when he finally opened the door. She hugged him as was usually their custom.
“You stink. Take a shower.” She wrinkled her nose at him.
“Yea, your hair also stinks. Take it down.” He dared her with his eyes.
Being a head taller than his bestfriend, he always had to bear the brunt of her smelly hair.
“I just fixed this one week ago, bruh. Suck it up.” Her eyes were scathing then they suddenly lighted up as they always did when she had something interesting to say, "Have you seen what she put on the bro’s and those page?"
His lips cocked up slightly. The name of that page always made him perk up a little. He had come up with that name. It was the name of the WhatsApp group page for the youth in the church they both attended.
He grabbed his phone and pressed his elaborate password into it and checked out the message. His fair skin immediately reddened as it always did when he was really excited. He looked at her, his face suddenly twisting with so much emotion.
“She finally said it.” Beatrice said.
“Yes...”, was all he could manage to choke out. Then he wrapped his long arms around her petite frame and pressed his lips to her forehead. Beatrice ignored the butterfly that danced momentarily in her belly and started squeeking for joy. She jumped repeatedly out of excitement.
Alfie screamed to the world. “She finally said she loved me back.”
He hugged his bestfriend again and swept her off her feet. He threw her ungracefully unto his bed and did some awful electric slide-like movements.
He knew he had taken a big risk proposing to Isabella on that platform. He was more than thrilled that it paid off in the end. It had taken Isabella one gruelling and tormenting week to send that reply. For all the sheer relief he felt, he could simply not hold in his joy.
“Okay so now get out so I can skype with my lovie lovie.”
“I also want to see her.”
“Nope, you ain’t gonna listen to my dope lines. Out, out.” He gently threw her out of his room as her eyes did all the swearing and cussing for her.
As she climbed the stairs and walked back into her own room in the Ever Green hostel, she thought of him and wondered why she felt the way she did when he kissed her forehead. She admitted it was unexpected, being the first time that he had done that.
But why that reaction?
She had been best friends with Alfred since the day they met at the hostel. Of course it was not official that very instance. But they clicked immediately and ever since then, they had been almost inseparable. Beatrice left her church to join his. He also gave her all his foodstuff and always ate at her place. And they always tried to sync their schedules so they could move around on campus together.
People had always thought they were dating, which they both found incredulous. His heart was with Isabella and her heart was irreparably damaged by some stupid imp.
She brushed off the thought and settled behind her study table. But it kept coming back to her. She could not admit to herself that she had been aroused by the encounter, so she settled for the fact that she was simply excited.
She prayed about it, opened the Bible app on her phone and finished up on her reading plan.
******
“Hurry up, we are going to be late.” he chided.
“I’m coming, can I just finish with this mascara?” She replied impatiently.
“It’s not as if you are dressing up for your boyfriend too oo. Oya kaba kaba.” He took out a pair of sandals that perfectly complimented her apparel. He grabbed her bag after she had put on her shoes and literally dragged her out of her room.
They walked slowly to classes they were already late for; his hands over hers,their step in sync...
They both wished they had siblings like the other.
When they had to part, he kissed her forehead and smirked, “Nobody will want you now.”
“Why?” She asked slightly breathless.
“Because I have marked you. You are mine” He smiled wickedly at her and walked off.
Beatrice could not help but be rooted right where she stood for a moment or two. It may have been a joke, but the way her heart jolted made her want to weep.
She made plans to tell him after the class that he shouldn’t say such things to her.
Her heart had been broken by a heartless oaf who did not know a good thing even though it was being shoved in his face. So she was too vulnerable to be hearing such words from the opposite sex at the moment.
The remainder of that morning was a blur apart from the time when she had been the joke of the entire class. Even that was slightly blurred. All she remembered was being unable to answer a question.
How could I answer a question I did not hear in the first place?
The lecturer's rhetoric was spot on though, “Stop thinking about him. You are the last thing on his mind.”
The entire class had laughed. Beatrice herself managed to choke out a nervous laughter. But in her heart she wondered how the lecturer could have been so spot on.
She waited an hour after class to meet up with him so they could walk back to the hostel together.
“You are awfully quiet.”
“It’s nothing."
“Tell me.” He stopped her right there and looked intently into her eyes, “You know I hate to see you sad.”
“Don’t.” Her defenses were being torn asunder. With every word he was striking every weak point in her walls, bringing it down and leaving a gaping hole straight to her heart, or what was left of it.
“What?!” He was getting impatient with her.
That made her remember to gather her wits about her. She shrugged out of his grasp and walked away from him. No, she was not going to break her own rules.
I will never be that kind of girl.
“Did I do something,” He pestered her.
“What should we eat?” She asked knowing very well that it was going to take his mind off what he had usually referred to as female drama.
“I think some yam and garden egg stew is in order today. I’m starving.”
She rolled her eyes.
Just like him. Stomach first.
“Don’t think I’ve forgotten. Just know that two can play the game.” That was usually his last resort.
“Thanks for caring, Alfie. But today is just one of those days that I can't stay happy throughout.”
He nodded sagely. But Beatrice could have sworn she had heard him say in his head, 'DRA-MAAAAAAA'
*****
They had settled down after eating. They were watching a movie series together, having squeezed themselves unto Beatrice’s tiny bed.
One actor said something funny that sent Alfie into spastic guffaws, the scent of salted fish still on his breath. It tickled Beatrice’s nose.She wrinkled her nose and of course Alfie caught her reaction.
“Well, I did not ask you to make the stew with all the three different kinds of salted fish, did I?”
Then he reddened ever so slightly. Beatrice knew that as a sign that he was about doing something funny.
“Now you are going to have to smell it.”
“Nooooooo” Beatrice laughed and tried to hold her nose. She turn her head from him.
He sat atop her and tried to literally get her nose in his mouth. She wriggled, laughed and tossed her head from side to side. He bent and tickled her at her waist. He knew Beatrice’s will not be able to hold on to her nose any longer if he did that. She immediately jerked forward. And their foreheads clashed. And very slightly, their lips brushed against each other.
As she placed her head back on her pillow she caught his eye cloud with wicked intentions. But in a second he turned red all over and laughed.
He grabbed unto his head and declared, “Is there a rock that’s harder than your head?”
He fell to his back by her side and after intermittent bouts of laughter he settled to continue watching the movie. Before long, he was knocked out with a content smile on his face, leaving Beatrice alone with her confusion, desperation and hurt.
She could no longer deny it. When their lips brushed, she had not only felt a flutter in her stomach, she was aroused.
I have to let him go.
That was the only way, she knew. She had to distance herself from him. She had not realized when or how, but he had picked apart her defenses, brick by brick, till her heart was bare and aching for his touch.
She looked up and cried out to God, “Help me.”
He shifted in his sleep and threw one long arm and leg over her. It may have been a protective reflex but to Beatrice it was the most romantic gesture. A tear fell down her face as she drifted into sleep herself. She knew she had gone too far to be helped.
*****
“Wake up.” He nudged her not so gently. “How can you nap for four hours straight?”
She shifted slightly and stretched.
“I’m going to call Bella. I miss her so much. She should have just stayed in Ghana. Career women of today…” He sighed sadly, “But by the time I come back you should be ready oo. You know that as executives we can't miss prayer meeting.”
By seven, they had gathered on the field with seven other executives. Alfred led as they prayed continually for two hours. It was so powerful, the president of the church union laid on the
bare ground weeping.
Beatrice broke into a powerful worship session and ministered for about an hour. She paused abruptly when an image of Alfred and herself having sexual relations flashed before her eyes. She shook it off.
It can never happen.
“It is an impossibility!” She screamed. “The devil can never triumph over the sons and daughters of God.”
The others joined her in her wail and prayed that the devil in no way triumphed over the sons and daughters of God.
Breaking off the prayer session became quite difficult but eventually, the last amen came and they all dispersed into the night.
Beatrice felt strengthened in her spirit. And she was confident that nothing was going to happen.
“What did you see?” Alfred asked, interrupting her thoughts. He knew that his best friend had started to manifest in the prophetic and he knew how she behaved when she saw a vission.
She smiled and said nothing.
*****
They walked to church in somber camaradie. When they entered, service was in full fling and the pastor was presenting the homily.
“Let him that thinks that he stands take heed, lest he fall.” The reverend said. “The one who thinks he stands has the most potential to fall. Let’s look at someone who actually stands... see this, that person can fall...anytime. But there is no falling for you if you are already on the ground. I lie?”
“Nooo" The congregation chimed.
“That is why you have to humble yourself and know your state. Even when you stand humble yourself under God’s power and grace. That is what will keep you on your feet. The worse of all is when you are languishing in the dirt and you have your head in the clouds. Then you deceive yourself." The pastor wiped his sweat with the white towel over his shoulders and continued.
"Let's look at something in Luke thirty-five." The pastor said.
A lady stood and gingerly read it to the hearing of the entire church.
"Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness."
"Take heeeed! Take heeeed! A man who thinks he stands may actually be standing or he may be falling or may have already fallen. The question then goes? 'What is your stand, brother? What is your stand, sister? Can you be honest with yourself? Can you humble yourself and admit to yourself where you actually are? Are you ready to be guided and led off the floor of sin onto the floor of his grace? Ask yourself. But do not deceive yourself. Believer, do not deceive yourself! Separate yourself from sin. And stop thinking you stand. Amen! O I said amen…”
Beatrice was silent.
*****
As they walked back, Beatrice was spared from Alfred's pestering questions because they were walking back with friends who were mostly Alfred’s.
When they got to the hostel he accompanied her to her room.
“Don’t think I did not notice how quiet you were on our way back. I just knew you didn’t want me bothering you, not when I was walking with my boys boys.” He placed his jaw on her head. “I don’t want to see you sad and quiet, please.” His voice broke in concern.
As he was about to kiss her forehead, she lifted her face up to him. His lips ended up on hers. He was hesitant to break off the kiss. And Beatrice, unable to help herself, plunged even deeper. Before it got any further, Alfred broke off the kiss.
“I’m sorry.” He murmured to the floor as he turned and walked away from her.
Beatrice let herself fall to the ground and weep.
In about five minutes he returned to find Beatrice on the floor. His heart jarred. He could not bear to see her so. He tugged her ever so lightly and led her to her bed. He knelt before her and didn’t know what to say. So instead he kissed her tears away. Then he slowly kissed her lips. Before they both knew what the other was doing, they were naked, panting and delirious with pleasure. Soon came the intense pleasure, so intense that it almost felt like pain.
Then came nothing.
The pleasure and pain had stopped and all that was left was a feeling of emptiness. When they looked into each other’s eyes, the shame, regret and self-disgust hit them with such a bang that Alfred literally bolted out of her room after dressing up.
Immediately she blinked, tears flowed freely as she began to mourn the loss of her virtue.
*****
For about a month or two, they did their best to avoid each other. They could not bear the shame of what they had done. So when Alfred opened his door to see a puffy eyed Beatrice, he knew his life as he knew it had come to an end.
“Don’t even say it.” Alfred said as he ushered her into his room, “We will keep it.”
The first part was smooth enough, Beatrice thought.
“Do you love me, Alfie?”
“I care about you, Beatrice. But you know I love Bella.”
She knew that but she had hoped anyway... Before she teared up again she run out his room and left behind the last shattered bits of her heart.
*****
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